Tuesday, July 24, 2007

My 1st Little Angel


Today my Olivia turns 3. She saved my life.

It was October 2003. I was 33, desperately in love with my wife, living in a beautiful home and making great money doing a job I loved. Something big was missing. A burning need unfulfilled. It was time.
"I need to have children, Cin".
"OK, let's start".
Cin had never considered having children prior to meeting me, but when we talked about it, she was open to the idea. As our lives became one and our love grew exponentially, she found herself wanting children, too. At first, maybe just for me, but she was sure. Let's have kids.
So we whittled down the donor possibilities, settled on Mr. Right and off we went to the clinic.
My cycle started in late October and in early November we went for our 1st insemination. It worked. We were pregnant!
9 months later, July 24, 2004, our first miracle came - Olivia Grace.
She was 6 lbs, 11 oz and 19 1/2 inches. She was a peanut and looked like a little bird. And she was ours. Ours to love and care for. Ours to worry about and to teach. Strange thing is, she has given me so much more than I have given her.

Olivia is kind and compassionate.
She is slow to warm, but when she does, people can't help but fall in love with her.
She is smart and funny and so very clever.
She is intuitive and wise.
Her smile is bright and her laugh is infectious.
My soul is nourished every time she looks in my eyes or throws her arms around me or places a soft kiss on my cheek or lips.
My heart aches to see her cry.
She has taught me how to love, for love's sake, and without expectation.
She has taught me what it means to be afraid. Afraid of losing her, or not knowing how to ease her pain.
I can't hold back the tears now as I write, just to know that I am blessed with this child.
I am blessed to know her and watch her learn.
I am blessed to have her love and warmth.
I am blessed that she is in my life and in my care.
I pray that I will never let her down; that I will always show her the love she deserves and provide her with everything she needs to be the beautiful, powerful woman she is supposed to be.
And I thank her - for everything I am now, for making me a kinder, stronger woman; for making me a mother.

11 comments:

Amy said...

Congrats to you and Cin for 3 AWESOME years with such a beautiful girl. Wishing many, many, many more.

K J and the kids said...

(song....C-minor)
Happy happy birthday OG dear. Happy days will come to you all year.
If I had one wish then it would be.
A Happy Happy Birthday to you from me :)

What a great post.
Thanks !

ECand3 said...

Thanks, ladies.
K - can't figure out the tune - can you sing it and record, then send it to me?
You must know what I'm feeling - even after the water incident. I'm all phclempt (sp?)

Amy - you, too. You must know how amazing it is to have a life in your hands. It's made even more special when you have younger ones who are on their way to becoming great little human beings.

Tracy said...

Beautiful post. I know exactly how you feel. I often look at our little miracles and am in awe at how they make our life complete. Sure I miss some things from our life before kids but I wouldn't trade any of it. Even the sleepless nights and the 3's we are suffering through. Let me be the first to wish you luck with the 3's, they've been kicking our asses for 8 hard months now. I hope 4 is easier but I look at the other two and remember we still have the 3's to get through with those two as well!

Holly said...

That is beautiful! She is very lucky to have such a wonderful mommy!

Dee said...

Big tears! OMG! What a beautiful post!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY OLIVIA!!!

hotomiky said...

Happy Birthday to you OG!

nailgirl said...

Happy birthday Olivia!

K J and the kids said...

Tagged you for a meme :)

ajs4ever said...

WOW!! I am speechless:) What a true testiment to the love of a mother and child! I sure hope to feel and share this amazing love one day:)

Tammy said...

Wow--You sure know how to make the tears roll! I totally relate because I feel the same way about my 3 beautiful girls who brighten my every day too! Here's to motherhood!
Happy Birthday, OG(aka Little Elyse)!